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Sunday, 19 April 2020

Another day in isolation....



Saturday
Total world cases: 2,272,445------------------- 43,106 increase
Total fatalities:  159,116-------------------------7,949 increase
UK total: 114,217-------------------------------5,525 increase
UK Fatalities: 15,464--------------------------- 888 increase

Sunday
Total world cases: 2,339,129------------------- 66,684 increase
Total fatalities:  165,006-------------------------5,890 increase
UK total: 120,067-------------------------------5,850 increase
UK Fatalities: 16,060--------------------------- 596 increase

Hi,

So, today is the lowest daily increase in deaths in the UK in the last two weeks.  I have no idea if this means anything - I hope it means they are going to continue to decrease, that it means the lock down is having an effect and that we are starting to turn the tide - fingers crossed it is even lower tomorrow. 

The news is talking about how front line staff  such as doctors and nurses are running out of protective equipment, some was supposed to arrive today from Turkey but didn't for some reason.  Having seen the protective equipment needed on video chat with my dad - I can't imagine what will happen if they don't have it! They can't just go into rooms with people full of the virus unprotected - they'd have to refuse and then the poor people suffering will suffer even more - so I sincerely hope that this is rectified very soon!

When my dad was moved to the high dependency ward in the last 24-48hrs, and we video chatted - the nurse answered the video call we made - we saw the nurse in full protective gear and it was so sad knowing my dad had to see that.  It was something that we discussed today.  Helen said that some people assumed that we had got to see dad at the end - and said to her (and they have said it to me too) Its good that you got to see him at the end.  This is frustrating for two reasons - one - we didn't get to see him in the flesh, and two - when we saw him on video call it was heart wrenching, not good to see that at all!  We got quite upset thinking about this - it is one of the things I try not to let myself think about because it is just too hard...

Today was pretty bad again in many ways.  In general, we seem to be doing fine - get up have breakfast and a brew, think about things we have to do today...  Big boxes of photographs were dug out.  We started to go through them - laughing, and sawing awww look at dad here, or look at dad with my kids etc.  Other pictures were funny, or just reminded us of the things we had done, forgotten about etc.  I gave up after a while thinking i'd come back to them tomorrow.  We took pictures of some of them on our phones and took some of the actual photo's as my mum doesn't need/want them all.

After doing this for a while me and mum took the dogs out for a bit and had a walk around the park.  Its quite nice really because we got out of the house and can have some quality time together.

I spoke to Andy on the way back as we have a couple arriving today to stay in the annex for a couple of months.  It's a doctor and her partner who is a 4th year medical student.  Airbnb are being crap and they haven't even managed to actually book and pay for it - but we let them come along anyway knowing (hoping) we can sort it out eventually.  Andy had to sort the annex out by himself - change beds and clean etc.

We got home and had lunch and I decided to go and have a look at the sash window that Dad had made for us and was going to fit - probably around now, or soon.  When I saw it I went to pieces - how good was he to make that for us and fit it!!  The time and effort he had put in!  I really hope he knew how much I appreciated it.  Everyday I see evidence of how awesome he was and it makes me miss him more and more.  I get angry and think - I want him back!!!!

So...I got a shower and just sat at my laptop not really knowing what to do with myself while Helen and my mum chatted in the garden for a while.  I just felt completely fed up and depressed.  We ended up sat in the living room, and I slept for about ten minutes - knackered all the time at the moment.  My mum had a more substantial sleep - as did Helen, and then we sorted tea out.  Soup and dumplings all round.  Then again we went and watched TV - Tiger King which I've seen before but thought they might like enough to get in to - so we are not flicking around channels not knowing what we want to watch. 

I expect tomorrow will be much the same. I am expecting a reply from my boss after I emailed him on saturday - I think he is back in work tomorrow?  We are also expecting to hear from the funeral home and get a date.  I don't have any appropriate funeral attire but I suppose it doesn't matter as there will only be 10 of us - and we can't hang around or anything.

I need to get to sleep - I keep staying up too late and still have to get up early.  Being so tired does not help the crappy situation we are all in at the moment. 


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