Thursday 23 April 2020

Apparently I'm 'spongy'


Hi

Wednesday
Total world cases: 2,633,232------------------- 76,745 increase
Total fatalities:  183,825-------------------------6,593 increase
UK total: 133,495-------------------------------4,451 increase
UK Fatalities: 18,100--------------------------- 763 increase

Thursday
Total world cases: 2,714,736------------------- 81,504 increase
Total fatalities:  190,293-------------------------6,468 increase
UK total: 138,078-------------------------------4,583 increase
UK Fatalities: 18,738---------------------------638 increase

The news today said that the UK figures are the lowest weekday figures in three weeks - apparently the weekend figures are lower because the people that report the figures are not at work - which pushes higher figures during the week.  I am guessing that when I said the figures were low and the news reporters didn't mention it - it must have been the weekend.

The news also says that as from tomorrow essential workers and their families can get tested - I assume the anti-body test.  It would be awesome to get a test and find out you've had it and been asymptomatic, what a relief that would be!  I think I might be an essential worker - when I'm actually back at work!  But...it might be a waste of the test because I really don't think I've had it - I think I have been very careful, even at the hospital....but you never know.

So....today - me and Helen went out early to have another look on the park to try and find mum's bracelet - but unfortunately we didn't. 

Joanne came around with some food from a farm shop - and we stood chatting for a while - from a distance.  At one point mum said to her that she was getting hugs off me and Helen - she said she has Helen, the skinny one - and Me - the......spongy one!!  Thanks mum!! 

Mum also said how Helen had been great doing all the paperwork etc. which she absolutely has - and then said and Sam has....and she struggled to say what I've been doing lol.  I know she didn't mean it, she knows I've done stuff too - if nothing else - moral support! But I have also been chasing things up, doing spreadsheets, cleaning, cooking, sorting shopping out...it was just funny at the time that she couldn't think of anything!

I had a video call with Lissa for a while when mum and Helen went out with the dogs - was lovely to see her lovely smiley face and her huge pregnant belly!  She has 5 weeks left! I was determined to make the call all positive and not get upset about anything - and that was quite easy as Lissa is just a naturally happy positive person and probably brings out the best in me.  It felt nice and more normal than things have seemed lately. 

We all had lunch outside again and then retired to the living room.  Mum went for a shower at one point and me and Helen got to chat openly without upsetting mum - about the things that we are concerned about (leaving mum, our family at home, the funeral arrangements, how we will probably go home and cry freely).

I made a chilli in the slow cooker tonight which I think mum really enjoyed - another success which is cool. 

At 8pm we went out to do the clap for the NHS - emotional, because we did it last week just after dad had died, and it brought it back, and we were clapping for the people that helped him and were with him at the end.  You could here people all around clapping and banging on things, and fireworks.  It is great to see/hear the nation coming together.  I guess the neighbors knew we had lost dad too...

So - after that we watched Money Heist - and then I came to bed. 

Funeral is a week today - Helen is getting stressed that if ppl are not happy with how it goes - what gets read out - they will blame her so I am going to get more involved with what people want said etc. then if there are any complaints, they can complain about both of us.  Helen was saying that she doesn't think anybody really understands what we went through last week at the hospital and with mum, and they probably don't.  Everybody was just dealing with their own upset and grief.  We went through something quite traumatic - having to push mum to be strong and go in there and be there for dad, and not give in to her emotions - and the call we had from the visitors room with dad.  It was all quite horrifying and mega upsetting and just horrible.  I don't mind or care if people don't appreciate what we went through and don't understand/know or whatever.  It makes me think that maybe Helen is struggling with that trauma - and any sign of complaint about the funeral will make her really angry - well, that would make me angry too I guess....  I dunno....just think Helen has taken on too much too fast after Dad died and she needs to give herself a break.

Goodnight xxx